IC Contact Post

[therushingsky]

"Heyyyy, you've reached the head office of the Atlas Corporation, leave a message and your number, and one of our people will get back to you."

Comments

[beejfu]

"-So she was all, 'You'll wake up my sister!" and I said "I WANT to wake your sister!' and that is how I banged all three of the Brontës."

He blinks. Looks around. Gives Rhys a complete withering expression.

"WHAT. Kind of in the MIDDLE of something, Rhys!"

[therushingsky]

"Hmm?"

Rhys looks up from his communicator, trying very hard to look completely innocent and not like a man who's just been told that he's simultaneously fired and arrested,

"Oh, hey, BJ! Kinda didn't see you there... but, y'know, as a warden - which I obviously still am - it is kinda my job to make sure you, uh--"

Stay in the place where you're bored and annoyed for no reason other than to bore and annoy you?

"Rest up from that death toll, huh champ?"

[beejfu]

"Well, uh." He seems confused that Rhys managed to escape demotion, but goes along with it for now.

"You literally just killed me so I'm pretty sure that your job is not to do that and I was right in the middle of something."

He directs a thumb out the infirmary door.

"You know. My Brontësaurus story. Plus I feel like the death toll all the time ever since I turned 30 and my knees went out sooooo. No rest when you're dead, am I right? I'll be going now."

[therushingsky]

"Yeah well- I don't know about killing you, that doesn't sound like it was my fault..."

Says Rhys, carefully typing out a string of abusive texts and still not looking at Betegeuse.

"But, I get it. You have stuff to do. That's fair."

[beejfu]

He narrows his eyes. There's something he's missing here.

"You just want me to leave so you can call me back here. You punk little asshole."

[therushingsky]

Rhys finally puts down his communicator, nestles down in his bed and yawns.

"Hey, you might not need the rest, but I feel like absolute hell. If you're fine, you're fine, whatever, but I'm not going to keep myself awake just to mess with you."

[beejfu]

He watches Rhys settle down with equal parts suspicion and confusion. This is not how his encounters usually go.

Finally, BJ points at Rhys in his snuggle bed.

"You summon me back here and I'll kill you again. Probably with medical equipment, I don't know. Then you'll be double-dead, Stringbean."

BJ sets his hand down again.

"K bye."

He walks out to go see about getting his hair dyed.

[therushingsky]

Four minutes later.

"Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice."

And then Rhys immediately pretends to be asleep.

[beejfu]

With an unholy scream that would have rattled the floorboards and at the very least made the lighting change, Betelgeuse appears in the infirmary;

"STOP SUMMONING ME."

He walks over to Rhys' bed, crouches down next to him to lift from the knees, not the back, and dumps him to the ground by flipping the mattress.

[therushingsky]

Rhys goes down with a groan of complaint.

"Ow, what the hell? What's with the shouting?"

He wraps his blanket around himself, determined to be snug even if he's on the floor.

"Why are you back anyway, didn't you just leave?"

Yep, someone else must have summoned you. Not Rhys. Rhys is an innocent.

[beejfu]

"Nope. Not buying it. Not this time, you little corporate shitstain." He's angry. He wants Rhys to die.

Never mind that he technically is dead now.

He pushes the mattress fully on top of Rhys on the floor and takes a bodily leap for it, squishing Rhys between infirmary floor and mattress.

"Time to die."

[therushingsky]

Rhys makes a louder and even more unhappy grunt than last time as the full weight of the other inmate comes down on him. The mattress is smothering--crushing too much air out of already oxygen starved lungs.

He manages to wedge his robotic arm out just enough to allow him to take a breath and shout up-- muffled through the fabric.

"The longer I'm in here the more I'm gonna do it, you stupid undead asshole!"

[beejfu]

He starts to squish Rhys into as much of a pancake as he can, wriggling around on the mattress.

"What? Can't hear you, buddy! Gotta SPEAK UP to summon me!"

[therushingsky]

Oh god this does not feel great-- stupid death toll, stupid suffocating in space, stupid admiral demoting him--

Rhys straightens out the fingers of his robotic arm, trying to jab as uncomfortably as possible into the other man, to try and disincentivize this particularly embarrassing murder attempt.

"I said screw you you asssass..."

Whoops, not quite enough air left in the lungs to finish that thought...

[beejfu]

Betelgeuse tries to think. Where the fuck can he go on this ship that won't just have him yo-yo back and forth to Rhys again.

Oh. Duh.

He fishes out his communicator and, still on top of the mattress on top of poor Rhys, starts typing a message to Iris.

A few seconds later, and the weight on Rhys disappears.

[therushingsky]

Betelgeuse has about four minutes for Rhys to get his breath back, before he tries summoning him again.

When it doesn't work, he hauls his shivering, wheezing body back up to his communicator to send a message...